How often do you think to yourself: “If I can just get through the holidays, everything will calm down and I can get back to life as normal.”?
It’s sad, but the reality for so many of us is surviving a time of year that was meant to bring peace and joy into our lives! We get so focused on giving to others that we push ourselves to the point of burnout, and by the time the New Year rolls around we’re too tired to set intentions and goals to pursue for the upcoming year.
So how do we avoid this from happening? We set better boundaries!
- Don’t let feelings of guilt drive your decisions.
We are all guilty of this. You spend all week working overtime to meet end of the year deadlines, get your holiday decor out the weekend after Thanksgiving, you purchase and wrap all of your gifts, you allocate hosting and travel obligations amongst family and friends, and then ONE MORE task falls onto your plate and you feel too bad to say “NO!!!!” This is a cycle that will surely lead to a breakdown, so you have to decide how many “yes-es” you have at the start of the season, and when they’ve all been given you must force yourself to implement a “no policy” when bombarded with more requests. Trust me, I know this is much easier said than done, but it will set you up to not run on fumes and actually enjoy the holidays for what they are!
- Plan out what you will say to family members that always seem to cross the line.
We love our family, but with family comes unique, and sometimes, rocky dynamics. Your mother-in-law is coming over and she has a history of making passive aggressive jabs at your cooking skills or how you parent your children. Or your dad has one too many comments to make about the state of our political system that sets everyone in the room on edge. If you pre-define some key responses to this type of behavior, and practice saying them outloud, you’ll save everyone in the household hours or days of continued tension. These boundaries protect you AND the people in lives!
- Don’t forget to set financial boundaries too!
It’s the most wonderful time of the year and simultaneously the most expensive! Financial stress can be one of the most toxic stressors a person navigates in general. So since you know there’s going to be additional pressure to buy and give during this time of year, make sure you go into the season with a strict and comfortable budget, and… STICK TO IT! Remember: No one wants you to give to them when the result of the purchase leaves you destitute! There are so many crafty ways to give in a cost effective way, so strategize on the front end, and hold your financial boundaries tight so that you’re not experiencing the heaviness of debt at the beginning of the year.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed with coming up with and setting your boundaries this holiday season, reach out to set up a free consultation with me.
